Growing old gay
Growing Old LGBT: Exploring The Many Hurdles Facing LGBT Elders As They Age
Nearly nine in 10 Americans say they know someone who’s same-sex attracted, but for the 1 to 3 million LGBT elders in the U.S., growing old gay could mean going back into the closet. In part one of this three-part series, KJZZ examines the many hurdles — including stigma, social isolation and financial challenges — facing LGBT elders.
Part 1: Shrink from of long-term care
Listen to Part 1: Horror of long-term care
Challenges Due To Sexual Orientation
Nearly nine in 10 Americans say they comprehend someone who’s gay, but for the 1 million to 3 million LGBT elders in the Merged States, growing old could mean going back into the closet.
But to understand why some LGBT elders feel this way, it's important to perceive where they came from.
"I don't think the word homosexual was in the dictionary, it might have been in medical dictionaries, but I don't think Webster's had it."
The woman who said that appeared in the video produced by the Boulder County Area Agency on Aging is lgbtq+. And its part of a project called Proposal Visibility, which is used to teach professionals and caregivers in the aging industry how to employ
My Fear of Growing Mature as a Gay Man
Having seen those gay men who are old, I could only think of two possible options for them – The Masc and the Fem. Going through Instagram and Facebook, I have observed one thing. The Masc guys have higher demand as they age, to a point. While Fems contain been subject to a lot of disadvantages through out their lives, it doesn’t get any finer as they age. 20 to 30 is the best time that they would have. The ones that I know finish up being more and more lonely, with friends that they have, they don’t really get a companion that they disburse time with. Their desirability goes down. It’s painful to see them this way.
However the masculine counterparts get to enjoy animation till their 40s. I met two guys in their early 40s who get hit on my younger guys even today. In fact, until they mentioned their age, it was hard to understand that they are so old!. The Mascs who have a rocking body, with their rugged looks, attract so much attention, when compared to their Queer counterparts.
This makes me wonder how would I grow old? I study an article by a guy in his 50s who mentioned how every guy would reject him and even if they did come, they
Aging As A Lgbtq+ Man: 6 Supportive Hints To Age Well
Yes, Aging As A Gay Guy Can Be Challenging, BUT…
Aging as a gay man doesn’t have to be viewed as a prison sentence. Yes, it’s true that aging for anyone can be complicated AND that aging as a same-sex attracted man has its unique challenges. Frankly being any age as a lgbtq+ man has its fair share of trials and tribulations. But this is the thing, having lived a animation as a same-sex attracted man (which of course isn’t easy) can actually equip you for aging as a homosexual man with bliss and purpose and give you unusual advantages. 6
While aging itself is an inevitable part of being human and part of this world, knowing this doesn’t make it easy to deal with. Accepting that you are no longer as complete of energy or young in appearance can be disheartening. It may feel like just yesterday you were a young 20-something making your own homosexual way in the world. If we choose to, we can be very intentional and encounter aging as lgbtq+ men with courage and joy. Below, I’ll give some tips as both a gay therapist and fellow aging gay man on things to store in mind
1. The Context Of Aging As A Gay Man
Unfortunately, for gay men, in particular, the process of aging i
Source: Drew Hays/Unsplash
The gay customs is unforgiving of aging. It highly prizes sexual potency, perfect bodies, and youth. This is for a good reason; any signs of vulnerability and imperfection feel dangerous in a heteronormative world where there is a sky-high likelihood to be rejected and criticised.
Many male lover men will have endured homophobic bullying at university whilst teachers turned a blind eye; having parents not understanding or accepting their sexual orientation; or a difficult and painful coming out process. In the here and now, there is still much homophobia in our society: being looked at in an intimidating or shaming way when holding their same-sex partner’s hand in the streets; hearing homophobic people making complaints when gay characters appear on television; being asked inappropriate sexual questions at a party that would never be asked to a heterosexual person; having to carefully select a holiday destination that is gay-friendly. All of these things, and more, are experiences heterosexual people never acquire to endure, it is not even in the periphery of their minds.
This is what we summon "minority stress," the chronic stress that occurs every day for being
I started living openly gay in 1987. I lived in a dwelling in Laketown and I moved my lover in with me and my sons. Many in the gay group seemed unimpressed by my story. I don't understand that. Maybe it's because they were accustomed to such things, and I was in my adv 30s and used to a direct life. Maybe they thought, "Well, what did she expect?" To me it was a shock. The following things happened: My children suffered taunting and teasing. It seemed the neighbors waged a war against us by unwavering harassment. Someone reported us to the city for trumped-up violations like sticks in our yard, overturned trash not picked up instantly enough and so on. I got letters from the city. Nighttime device calls started. I know there were other, quieter, gays in Laketown who appeared unbothered. I eventually sold the house at a big loss and left. Whatever the neighbors did to us, there was no law against wanting a homosexual out of your neighborhood. People who didn't even understand me hated me. I realized with a new clarity that we were alone.
Then my ex-husband got a lawyer and tried to take my sons away from me. We finally split the boys up, one lived with him and the other with me. Th